My great grandparents build a cabin on a quiet, secluded lake in 1950. It still has no internet and TV, yes! But no shower, no! Fast forward 65 years and the lake is no longer quiet or secluded. It is more of a party lake which tends to happen when a lot of people find out about a really great quiet lake. I spent the weekend up there with my family, my parents, and Matt. Time changes people. Matt is no longer that wild autistic boy who runs around hurting himself and others. He is entering middle age, less then a year from 40. It has been almost 13 years since he attacked someone, my oldest daughter. My dad has mellowed out over the years, but is still a surly old man who says hurtful things. My mom has really stayed the same.
I did take some time to huddle up by the fire and lounge with a beer by the lake. The most exciting thing that happened was walking to get some ice cream. Even though I was technically off from marathon training over the weekend, I am still very active. I am the type of person that has a hard time sitting still, although marathon training has helped with that. There were about 100 bikers outside of the ice cream place and adjoining bar. I just wanted to get out of there. Just me and my two kids, disabled brother, my senior citizen mom, and a dog that probably could develop a liking for cigarette butts. And 100 bikers!
As we were leaving, a biker came out of the bar and passed out 5 feet away from me. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t have anything against bikers, just so many people that I felt a little trapped. I am not afraid of anyone. I could get into the biker lifestyle with the piercings, tattoos, leather jackets, skulls, not to mention having my hair blowing freely on the open road. There is a certain freedom in that. But, alas, my husband is a sailor not a biker.
Last year we bought a 25 foot sailboat. It has already provided us with a lifetime of adventure (another blog). I can imagine a vagabond lifestyle country hopping, seeing the world. I imagine a future of sailing or driving across the world with no plan. In real life I am a schedule freak. Everything must be in its place and control must be maintained at all times. I run a tight ship. But in my dreams I am calm, relaxed, serene, peaceful. I am driving across the country in a VW robin egg blue hippie van, wearing bohemian clothing, and listening to 60’s music with no cell phone and just a camera slung over my back. No itinarary, no schedule. If I can run a marathon, what can stop me from doing everything I want to do in life? At 40, I am as young as I will ever be.